me right now?

I sit and think too much. I over analyze. But I like me that way some days, sometimes. Grade nine was hell, public school was hell. I like freedom, but living in a rather small town makes that pretty much impossible. I haven't found much time to update this site, even though I have more free time than I ever did. I just seem to sit and think. I enjoy thought. Thought is free. No one can tell me what I can and cannot think.

Beautiful images fill up my heart, and some time make me cry or laugh, dance. Beautiful music fill up my mind and makes me fly. Writing is a release, it harder and harder for me to talk now I have grown a shell, I am very protective of my own self and people close to me. 

I live in a hole that I share with my sister, divided down the "middle". there is about enough room to store my guitar, a shitty computer that doesn't work (and I don't use unless I am typing school things), a dresser, and my bed. My cd player sits under it so when I crank it I can feel the bass. there is a little room for me to walk to the door in my half, and you can't see it though the 30 cd's scattered over it.

I cover my limited wall space in pictures and images that give me feeling. and I always add, I want to have the whole thing one big collage.

I don't get along with really anyone in my house right now, I am quieter and quieter everyday, and no one seems to notice. I cry a lot, and no one seems to notice. I go by many names, and I am most frequently called 'freak' when I am at school, or nerd (by nick, lol). I think nerd is more accurate. I am a little too computer literate sometimes, but I still think not enough. I love to play guitar, I have been playing for two months, and I think I am coming along o.k. (for two months anyway...okay I suck, but I have only been playing two months...ahh!)

I like my friends. sometimes *certain* ones can turn around and be quite annoying and bitchy for no reason. some I have known too long. Some no matter how long I have know them, it's not enough (ok, I do love you to death Gwen). Some friends I trust, some I don't. the ones I don't....I 'accidentally' forget to give them this www address, only because I know it means confrontation.

and how do I finish this...hmmm

I am tall, and I have short hair which I am attempting to grow again. It's purple-ie black right now, but it is going to be dark *purple* soon. I usually wear black, but I am not a goth. not that anyone know what a goth is/is not. 5 ear piercing's, and I want my eyebrow done. I wear glasses right but I think they are dying, and I am getting contacts. my eyes are very very very blue. My skin is pale and rosy, I wear about 70 bracelets at once, and I like to wear make up different designs everyday, different colors. funny things. Safety pins rock, I chew on them a lot, and people think it's dangerous. But I don't mind.